Over the years I've learned that the first step to self care is accepting yourself at the core of who you are. It's something I've struggled with for the majority of my life, but I've learned that a true understanding of who you are and what you want is essential in building a life of self care.
I'll never forget the moment when I realized my idea of myself was flawed. Same as anyone else, I had assumed I was making decisions based off what I wanted, or because they lined up with my values and personality. I was so, so wrong. It was back in 2015 when I first read the article that forced me to reevaluate my acceptance of myself. It introduced the idea of asking the question "Do I like who I am while I’m doing this?" while evaluating our lives.
I sat there, reading this article at my desk in a job that didn't take care of me, and realized that I didn't like myself in a lot of my life. And I've had to revisit it again and again to keep myself in check over the years. It's how I came to be where I am today. I didn't like who I was while doing work that wasn't my best because I knew no matter how hard I tried it wouldn't be good enough. I didn't like who I was driving an hour and a half each day, coming home exhausted, braindead, and full of road rage. I didn't like who I was having to fight each and every day to be treated with respect from 9-5, then hiding my real business -- my real me -- after hours.
Do you know when I do like when I am? I love who I am when I watch a client make affirming comments about themselves and believe it. I love who I am when I watch someone walk away from a conversation with me happier than when they started it. I love who I am when I'm connecting with other people. I love who I am when I'm around my family. I love who I am when I'm being true to myself.
I highly recommend reading the entire article. Not only does the author dig in further to what it means to ask yourself this question, but he also delves into the reason why we don't always act on it. You can find the whole post here: http://www.raptitude.com/2015/01/self-esteem/
I challenge you to think about your own life in terms of this question: When do you like who you are? Do you like who you are when watching the fifth television episode in a row? Do you like who you are when you are surfing the internet? Or do you like yourself when you're going for a run in nature? When you're reading a book that challenges you to think outside yourself? Share when you love yourself the most in the comments below! Or join the party on Instagram and share with me there: https://www.instagram.com/katrina.widener/
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And when you’re ready, here are three ways I can help you: