Why You Need to Ditch Self-Deprecating Humor

stop self-deprecating humor

Okay kids, take a deep breath. I’m going to say something that probably won’t make you feel great inside. But keep reading, because there’s a purpose. The instant someone turns to self-deprecating humor, I immediately know a few things about them.

  1. They have low self-esteem.

  2. They avoid feeling uncomfortable at all costs.

  3. They aren’t going to bring too much greatness into their lives. Good, sure. Content, yeah. But great, amazing, out-of-the-park things? Nope.

Sound like you?

Now, I’m not saying this to be harsh. I want you to have amazing greatness, all of you. I want you to succeed and have confidence and feel like you’re rocking it — that’s literally the feeling my business is based off of. But self-deprecating humor is not going to help you get there. In fact, it’s holding you back.

See, when you make jokes at your own expense, your brain doesn’t get it. It doesn’t see it as a joke. It sees it as truth. So next time you call yourself an idiot for forgetting milk at the store, your brain is like, “Okay, I’m an idiot, writing that down, filing it away for later.” Then, when your boss announces a big project and you consider throwing your hat in the ring, your brain will remind you, “Nope, you’re an idiot, remember? You could never do that.”

Whatever comes out of your mouth (or runs through your head), your brain takes as truth whether you intend it or not. Every single time. So if you often make jokes at your own expense, it’s pretty easy for me to tell you’re doing it because your brain believes it. It’s usually a joke made to 1) deflect the conversation in uncomfortable settings, or 2) to get a cheap and easy laugh (aka to get outside approval from others).

So stop with the self-deprecating humor. It doesn’t make you look stronger (in fact, the opposite). It doesn’t make you seem funnier. And it doesn’t actually deflect from the hard conversations. It’s just self sabotage that’s holding you back from the life you’re dreaming of.

Share your experience with self-deprecating humor with me in the comments below, or join the party on my Instagram and share there: https://www.instagram.com/katrina.widener/

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And when you’re ready, here are three ways I can help you: